Friday, March 10, 2006

Teeth are Gone; Spring is Here

Yesterday was a jewel of a day - it had finally rained a real rain, complete with thunder and lightning, the night before. Everything looked clean and refreshed. There is the faintest blush of green across the hills now as buds begin to open, and the world is full of crystalline color. The Bradford pears - snowy white - and Japanese quince - shockingly pink - are in bloom, as are the crocuses, reaching up from their humble spot on the ground, and the daffodils, bobbing cheerfully in the breeze.

I made it through this winter with just a slight touch of depression - worse than last winter but better than I have experienced before. It generally starts in December or January as a feeling that people don't like me, that they are excluding me or ignoring me. Then towards February it moves on to a feeling of being trapped, of wanting out, wanting something else. By March it has faded to a dull hopelessness, then Spring arrives, and I am in ectasy.

By now I realize that the thoughts and feelings I have during the SAD season are not my own, not quite real, and that is such a weird sensation - knowing that the emotions you have aren't quite true, that in a few months you will feel quite different about things you feel darkly about at the time.

The past 24 hours have been a whirl of pills, pain, and sleep. Oh the sleep - every mother should have her widsom teeth out! The operation itself was just like a nap, and the pain pills I'm on carry me off to sleep far more gently than codeine. I've had so many nice naps. I haven't felt this well rested in a very, very long time. Of course there's the blood and the vomit and the pain, but naps! It's wonderful!

I have decided that once I have the dental situation under control I am going to treat myself to pizza, real pizza from a restaurant with cheese from an animal that moos rather than maaaas. Pearl didn't seem to react to the cream in the scones I ate - I think the snottiness is a cold - so I want to try cheese and see if she's over the dairy thing yet. Hopefully the poor girl is!

4 Comments:

Blogger Elaine said...

Glad the op went well and you're recovering well. Sleep does sound so nice...

And so very glad the winter blues are blushing to pink!

9:12 AM  
Blogger sarahgrace said...

I am so looking forward to spring at our place too, but we have been having some unseasonal snow. Waaaah! I'm ready for the winter depression to go too.

8:09 PM  
Anonymous Mama C-ta said...

Ahh, much needed spring is right. I get the winter blues and feel exactly like you do almost to the exact same time line. Friday's beautiful weather really boosted my mood.

Get that mouth healed up and enjoy some pizzaaaa!

5:15 AM  
Blogger Teri said...

You know you're a mom when getting teeth yanked out of your head is a siesta.

I hear you on the winter blues. Spring is right around the corner! Promise!

8:43 PM  

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