Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Vomit, Unselflessness, and Guilt

Last night Pearl threw up again after she went to sleep, and we have a culprit - both nights that she's thrown up, we've had an egg dish for dinner. It contains both eggs and almonds... two iffy things to feed babies but she has had both of these seperately with no problem, so I don't really know what the deal is, just that we won't be feeding her that dish for supper again any time soon!

Before she threw up, we had company over and were playing Scrabble (my favorite!) and she kept waking up. I was getting quite irate, the one night I am doing something fun with adults that I'm neither married nor related (by blood, at any rate) to is the one night when she won't sleep unless she's on top of me. She wouldn't nurse, wouldn't lay on her back and when laid down on her front she immediately started crawling. I feel bad that instead of picking up on the fact that something was wrong I was preoccupied with how mad I was about not getting to spend a pleasant evening with our company. It's hard to be selfless 100% to the time. Hard to always put her first. I try though and when I fail I feel so bad about it, and dumb too, in cases like this where I should've known something was up.

So it was after they'd gone and we were watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer (a show we have become quite obsessed with) when she threw up. I didn't make it to her in time and she threw up on the bed on only a little bit on me this time... I'd bought a plasticky mattress cover to protect it from diaper leaks just last week but I laid it out to air and then my husband folded it up and stuck it... somewhere... so sadly the mattress was not in fact protected but hopefully is not permanently embued with the oh-so-pleasant scent of baby puke.

She's okay now, I'm mostly ok, my husband is okay. He's a good sport about cleaning up the puke while I shower with Pearl.

Also, the marmot is okay. I saw him alive and well this morning, grazing away. My future bounty of vegetables is once again at risk but I'm not terribly concerned about it.

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Anonymous Mama C-ta said...

I hate hearing things like this :( I am still hoping it's just a rare fluke and not really the eggs or almonds.

I know what you mean about getting mad when they keep waking up when you just want ONE night for fun, finding out something is wrong, feeling like the worst mother, etc. It's hard and nothing to feel bad about. Although that doesn't stop me.

6:48 AM  
Blogger christina said...

Oh god, don't feel bad. How could you have known? It's perfectly okay that you didn't tune in--you're such a perceptive mama...and what's a little baby puke anyway? So it's only eggs/almonds in combination, huh? Very weird.

By the way, I am SO jealous of your garden! With all of our renovations, I wont have a chance to put one in this year, and I'm bummed!

7:15 AM  
Blogger sarahgrace said...

We all have been there, on probably more than an occasional time...don't be too hard on yourself- you're only human, and being a parent is just tough sometimes.

5:05 PM  

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